February 26, 2015

Happy 2nd Birthday Avery-Harper

HAPPY 2nd BIRTHDAY TO MY SWEET BABY GIRL LITTLE MISS AVERY-HARPER!!!

Most of you know via my blog that I have fertility problems. For four long years I underwent numerous medications, hormones, injections and a few surgeries to correct the problem. In the end I found out IVF was my only option. It was super scary, super expensive and not guaranteed. My husband gave me 2-3 injections in my stomach daily for numerous weeks. I was being monitored by my fertility doctor 5-6 times a week. We spent well over $35,000 out of pocket during those 4 years. But at the end of it all we were blessed with our miracle.

Avery-Harper decided to come a few days before she was scheduled. She caught us totally off guard and arrived with her mother looking a HOT MESS (which you'll see in the video 😒) When she was delivered via c-section she swallowed a lot of amniotic fluid. Because of that I was unable to see her in person for almost 7 hours after she was born! There's a moment in the video where the nurse wheels her in the room. She hands her to me and I just held her in front of my face and looked at her. I nuzzled her face to mine and my heart immediately exploded. I wept and wept and wept. I wept for all those years, all those shots, all those tears and for all of my fear I had going on that journey. Words can not explain what I felt finally holding my own child. My mom always told me "there is no love like a mother's love" and "when you're a mother you'll understand". She was right and I'd go through all of that again and again just to have this kind of love in my life. So if I post too many pictures or I'm too mushy with my status updates, that's why. Without that journey I may not be a mother today! Avery-Harper is both my blessing and my miracle. The way I love her can not be explained. God forbid if I were only given these two years to be her mother. Well I'd definitely say it was worth my entire existence.

I've shared this video here before bc it means the world to me. After two years I still can't believe she's here. I still can't believe that I'm a mom.

Turn up the volume and enjoy! Thank you BluDoor Studios for this amazing gift! I called you all last minute to tell you she was arriving within an hour and somehow you made it! You stayed at the hospital for 8 hours just so you could get these images! We are forever indebted to you!
https://www.facebook.com/bludoorstudios. http://www.bludoorstudios.com

Here's Avery-Harper's BIRTH day video!
http://video214.com/play/ZbEHnvSiyaoRET0y1rl5rA/s/dark

February 16, 2015

DIY Chalkboard Mirror

This old mirror use to grace one of the walls of my mom's formal living room. She always loved this old mirror but it was never my style. After her passing I decided to keep the mirror. I didn't exactly know why I was keeping it but something just wouldn't allow me to part with it. So it sat in my garage for over a year. During one of our garage sales many people tried to purchase it but I always declined. Now I'm in the process of redoing my daughter's room and I thought the mirror would make a great "fancy" chalkboard. I figured I could use it to write inspirational messages to her each day. This DIY project was fairly easy and now my daughter has a piece of her grandma's décor hanging in her room.  It turned out really cute and I love being able to walk in her room and see my mom's mirror.  It brings back so many memories and I get to relive them multiple times a day! Now I just have to work on my chalkboard handwriting and graphics skills! Ha! #repurpose
 
 
BEFORE

BEFORE

I APPLIED THREE COATS OF RUSTOLEUM
 CHALKBOARD PAINT

CONDITIONING---WHICH MEANT ROLLING CHALK ON IT
 SIDE ALL OVER THE BOARD, THEN EARASING

AFTER

AFTER

AFTER


DIY Wall Mounted Bookshelves

My daughter has tons of books and her previous bookshelves weren't going to work in her new space. I found an idea for super cute, inexpensive wall mounted book shelves. All I needed was some inexpensive 1x4 and 1x6 pieces of wood, wood glue and nails from Home Depot or Lowe's. So I had the hubs (my personal carpenter) put them together. Then they were primed, painted and mounted! All for under $20!!

Avery-Harper loves being able to grab a book and sit on her rug or at her little table and flip through them. She also is enjoying picking out whichever book she wants read to her. It turned out really cute! I still have SO MUCH to do but her new "Big Girl" room is coming together 😊

BEFORE

DURING MOUNT PROCESS

MOUNTED

AFTER

AFTER W/ THE NUGGET

DIY season is in full swing!!!

I've been heavy on my DIY grind for Avery-Harper's new big girl room! The lighting in her room has been changed to an old chandelier that I upcycled. It's super cute, old and solid with all the original crystals except for three.  I found it at a warehouse for old home fixtures and it was originally marked for $125!! It ended up costing me under $45, which is great for a crystal chandelier. I cleaned it, washed all the crystals and painted it a bright vibrant teal! It's the perfect size for a little girl's room and adds a little bit of glamour for my sassy little nugget!


BEFORE

BEFORE
 
BEFORE
 
AFTER

AFTER

AFTER

AFTER

AFTER
 

Sometimes you just have to LET GO AND LET GOD...

So once again my nephew is no longer living with us. This time it's final-
It's just too much drama and with all the moving parts of a combined THREE different household structures, it's just time for me to bow out.

I'll always love my nephew more like a parent than an aunt but what can you expect after 8 years of thinking of him as my own.  With that being said I'm moving on and establishing my new role as "just auntie" instead of "auntie-mom"!  It was a HARDDDDDD decision but I believe it's time to cut the safety net and let his parents figure it out.  Hopefully the seeds we've planted will stay with him a life-time.  He'll always be auntie's baby but as of February 2, 2015, auntie-mom has left the building.

February 2, 2015

Family or Foe

Sometimes you have to make very hard decisions in life in order to break a cycle. That cycle for me was broken today. People will take advantage of you and hold you to expectations that they don't hold themselves too! Why, because you allow it. Well the safety net has been cut, I'm moving on- #lessonlearned

January 9, 2015

Silly Selfies w/ Avery-Harper

No words could ever express how much I adore this child!
If I have one obsession, she's it!

January 8, 2015

Needy

I need your validation 
I need you to love me
I need you to need me and want me in your presence
I loved you before we met and once I held you it was solidified 
I've never been one to need other's admiration but I need yours
My fear is that you won't love me as much as I need you to 
That you won't love me in time 
I fear we will have a rough path like most mother/daughter relationships
I fear you will spend most of your time avoiding me, instead of loving me for me
I did that to my mother
Unfortunately I learned that life can be gone in an instant and there are no do-overs
I pray our relationship is smoother because our time may be shorter 
Shorter due to the fact that I started mothering you later 
I pray to God, that you, Avery-Harper will love me in real time because forever isn't promised my love-
I pray that you know I needed you just as much as I wanted you
You are the song of my soul and I just wish my voice was sweet enough to sing your glory-
You make my heartbeat out of my chest and my smile go beyond my face 
You are all the best parts of me
Grow old in good health my love and be happy
You don't have to be perfect 
You don't have to be rich
Just be a decent human being 
Understand the power of love and if you do nothing else for me, just do this-
Please love me better than I loved my mom.


January 2, 2015

Bitter....Better! 2014 I bid you adieu!

2014 has been quite the year! As I look back on it I can see I learned, endured and sacrificed a lot. However, it was not without great lessons and even greater blessings.

My miracle baby is turning two soon and it's been an amazing ride! I'm beyond blessed to be her mother and I thank God everyday for his favor. I celebrated my 7th year wedding anniversary with my near perfect husband. Together we are happy, healthy and in love.

I've also experienced some major loses this year in my personal life. I was not prepared for any of them but I count it all joy.

My FET failed so no baby #2 (at least not right now)
Family dynamics changed but made way for a clearer direction.
Major friendships are barely friendships at all anymore.
A few new business owner lessons were learned the hard way.

However everything happens for a reason and I trust in HIM.

2015 already looks bigger, better, brighter and more blessed. Here's to nothing but positivity ahead and to living in LOVE.

Holiday Horse Drawn Carriage Ride

We had this scheduled a couple of weeks before Christmas but the weather didn't cooperate. We actually ended up going a couple of days after Christmas with our friends and their 4 year old daughter. I was shocked that Avery-Harper was so into it! We will definitely try this again next year but before Christmas! Maybe it'll be a new tradition for us!
 
 



Our nugget!

The horses were named Salt and Pepper! Lol

Our neighbors and very good friends, The Martinez Family!

Christmas Day 2014

Spent with our second family whom we love dearly!
 
 
 





Christmas Morning 2014

It was quiet, beautiful and just us!
 






Christmas Eve 2014

My family came over, we opened gifts, played games and ate till we were sick! Good times!
 
 
 






2014 Holiday Card

  
Avery-Harper 21mos and Keyshawn 7